


A letter to my 19 year old self

by parasolwrites



Category: Original Work
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-17
Updated: 2019-01-17
Packaged: 2019-10-11 13:54:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 286
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17448254
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/parasolwrites/pseuds/parasolwrites
Summary: Darling...don’t make the same mistakes I have.





	A letter to my 19 year old self

**Author's Note:**

> I wish I knew then what I knew now.

Dear parasol,

Lock up your heart and throw away the key. Don’t let anyone inside under any circumstances. It’s the only way to save yourself. The jealousy you feel now is worth it to not feel the heartbreak and loneliness you will eventually feel. Believe me.

Be kinder to your brother. He’s young and going through a lot, but he still needs you. You’re not yet mature enough to really understand how much he needs you and he’s too stubborn to ask for your help, but he needs it desperately. You’re the only adult who won’t judge him. Remember that.

Cherish your friends while you still have them. Soon enough, they’ll leave you. Create good memories with them.

Don’t believe her when she says she don’t cheat on you: she will. Don’t believe her when she says the distance won’t bother her: it will. But most importantly, don’t believe her when she says she loves you. She doesn’t. She never did. Please, don’t give her your heart. She’ll take it and you’ll only get back a shattered version of it when everything falls apart.

Don’t forgive her. Don’t get back with her. When it ends, run for the hills and don’t look back.

Lastly...do something with your life. Go to school, get a job, start fresh somewhere new...just do something. Don’t waste more time than you already have. It’s already been too long. It will only get harder.

Dear...please treat yourself better than I did. I did such a bad job, and I fear I have so little left to give and not a lot to live for. It’s up to you now. But I believe in you.

I’m trying to love you.

**Author's Note:**

> Love isn’t real, but it’s a beautiful illusion.


End file.
